14
Nov
07

Collisions. Lots of them.

I was driving around the city yesterday and you wouldn’t believe the sheer number of collisions I saw. I never kept track of them but offhand I can count at least ten. Apart from the normal bumps and not so subtle nudges, there were a few that were either weird, gruesome, funny (excuse my sense of humour) or just plain dumb.

First, I saw a car while trying to overtake another, went a bit too far and got one wheel over the stone dividers. The car went a small distance before colliding with a metal barricade that the police generally stick wherever they fancy. This was on the road between Gandhi Mandapam and Kotturpuram.

Next, at some place in Nungambakkam, a speeding moped turns sharply, whacks a guy standing near a median to cross the road and then smacks right in to a lady that was standing by the side of the road facing the opposite direction. Like all good citizens of India, the people nearby crowd around her to make sure any thought of fresh air is pointless. An auto driver, who eventually took her to the hospital, had to practically fight his way through the crowd that was unwilling to give up their ring side view of the setting.

On a calm street in K.K Nagar there was this rather hilarious incident. A guy while riding his cycle was talking on his cellphone. He cycles right in to this open manhole and his front wheel gets stuck in it. Now, he wasn’t going particularly fast or anything but for some reason his back wheel lifts up in the air, swings to the left and he falls off his cycle and lands on a pile of coconuts stacked by the side of the road (The usual piles next to a coconut water vendor). The funny part was the expression on his face (kinda half shock, half glee that he’s still alive) while lying on a pile of coconuts and that he was still clutching his cellphone and I could hear that someone else was screaming on the other end. I helped him get his front wheel unstuck. I’m not sure he appreciated it though, maybe because I was laughing my head off right before that.

Lastly, the not so funny part, I’m waiting for the signal to turn green at the L.B Road - Sardar Patel road junction when some jerk decides that the best way to take a u-turn is by trying to power slide in to my bike and then get to the opposite side on the rebound. Total moron. Not only did he topple my bike and jam the kick start lever, he also managed to attract the cops. Luckily there were enough bystanders around that could explain what happened without me trying to do so in my pseudo-tamil. Actually, now that that I think of it, they never even gave me a chance. Not that I mind.

The whole thing seemed so unreal. A few accidents every now and then is normal in Madras but that many on roads that hardly support speeds of greater than 40 kmph? Seriously, I’m taking out the car next time. If someone wants an early end, at least I won’t have to tag along.


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3 Responses to “Collisions. Lots of them.”


  1. 1 George Nov 25th, 2007 at 11:28 am

    Ha ha, those are hilarious. I saw a couple of collisions too, ridiculous things:

    1. Two motorcycle dudes nearly fell off their bikes on Mount Road. They were in the wrong lane. I was hoping they would fall down.

    2. This car dude was trying to take a U-turn at the Madhya Kailash signal after coming down from the Ambika Appalam side of Sardar Patel Road. There’s no U-turn there. Remember when there were these barriers to force cars in two lanes to turn right? He was taking a turn around them. As if this wasn’t enough, enter two-wheeler trying to do same thing. Collision. Very funny. Like some modern art sculpture. Motorcycle leaning on car, on the other side - no wait, I’ll draw it.

    |CAR|\°/¯BARRIER¯\/¯BARRIER¯\

    From left to right: |CAR| is the car, \ is the motorcycle, ° except he has legs in the air. The Barriers are barriers.

  2. 2 George Nov 26th, 2007 at 12:45 pm

    Dude, it’s disappeared again. Retrieve my comments.

  3. 3 Toxic}{ermit Nov 26th, 2007 at 3:06 pm

    Ah, I found your comment this time. It was sandwiched between viagra and mortgage plans.

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